Had a very busy weekend. Running from place to place.
jQ's grandpa passed away on friday night, midnight, to be more exact. We rushed to the TTSH upon hearing the news that he might not be able to make it...but we were too late. He left before we reached. Wells, I must say he left peacefully, and without much struggle.
This brought back memories of the day gong gong left us.....but it was much more dramatic. Gong Gong wasn't able to talk, eat, or even open his eyes to take a look at us. He had a strong will, but, had lotsa struggle before he finally left. :( We all miss u.

so, saturday was lesson, and going to different studios to get shoes. Den, home, den rested den practised, den went to look for jQ near midnight. Stayed...and parents came, talked, eat, den back to his house. Barely slept, and today morning had to go visit my late gong gong...prayed, and back home. Bathed fluffy (which took quite long....) and later I got to prepare to go lesson. Den practise. DEN....rest, and prepare for the long work week. I feel breathless typing this...haha. SUFFOCATING.

My legs are aching.
But I am high *on heels*.
SW knows what I mean...
haaa.
Btw, I haven't really figured out what was right today...
other than being high on heels?

BLAH.
Things can only get better...
or, I won't allow it to get worse.

Quality. Not fighting.
We may not get there now, but at least we know what is right.
They, u knoe who, may be up there now, but for the wrong reasons.
That won't last. I know, and I just do.

WHATEVER. let me be high on heels. *SICK*

Finally, it's really at the tail end of the previous audit, and I do feel much better. Today I started on a new engagement...and this one, I have just a small part to play. I hope to finish my area asap, and help Celine out on her portion. THEN I AM GG ON LEAVE! ...... And then, it's the Millenium comp. How should I put it...I am stressed up, cos of the competitors. Really tough, and so many new partnerships, which are simply getting stronger and stronger. Now it's not about who is good, but who improves more. That's the scary part. Well, it's ok...just do my best, and do things right.

jQ is sweeter than ever these days. I am feeling the LURVE .... :)

3 days of break just flew past like that. I really enjoy taking a break from work....cos work is just soo tiring these days.

I am soo happy. jQ bought me a pc, and now I am able to surf and watch tv all at the same time, AND in my room. YEAH! Now I don't have to "beg" brother for the comp when he is at home. Hee...my room feels so complete now. *wink*

Ohh...and I caught fluffy smiling....soooo cute.

This is my home in 3 years time. The middle block is ours... :) That's block 8. keke. We've got the addy oredie!

Blk 8, CityView @ Boon Keng #14-146 S(330008)!!

heheheeee.

I can't believe this...that IT IS MINE now. :) My intuition is right...
I still can't believe I got it.
But I am happy....
I felt relieved too....I got what I want. I am looking forward to it, very much.
But, mentally unprepared. As of now.

:)
:)
:)

ello~

I got my new phone. I am enjoying it....the first Motorola phone. Wells, the interface isn't as bad, I guess the technology has enhanced, and the interface is almost similar to Sony Ericsson. I got it becos it is the nicest flippy around currently. Don't really fancy slides and got bored with the normal block-like ones. LOVE!

Finally I got a chance to visit the new ferry's wheel. I meant touring the centre, but din go on board the "flight" (this is how the ticket counter call the ride). Had Popeye's for dinner this evening with jQ. :)

ookies, I got my rhumba. There is so much to work on, but I am confident of executing it well. I know I can.

*I am hoping for some luck tml afternoon. Fingers crossed*

I am watching dance video (and not in office, which I am supposed to. Dang...but I just don't see myself working much anyway. excuses?) ... and I wish I can have my practice now. No dance today, and my legs are itchy. no ballroom too. How boring.

At least I got all my credit card bills settled, I really mean ALL (and brought fluff for a walk too, though not west coast park.) And that in itself is a big accomplishment...finally I can be debt free!! I shall use only 1 credit card, and if possible, use CASH. hahaa....

I am going to bathe lil one.... tata. And hopefully I get my new phone tonight with jQ.

Finally I managed to go to the bank and put my bonus aside as savings...otherwise, I believe it's gona be depleted in no time. Well just can't I made this silly mistake of dropping a cheque payable to OCBC credit cards into the DBS Quickcheque deposit. Now I wonder where my cheque is! The DBS staff hasn't called me...

Haven't done any preparation for the Taiwan trip...it's exactly one month from now. :) Hopefully it will turn out fine.

Sigh, I gota go back to the office tml. The first time working on a weekend here...unlike KP days. Please let me get this over SOON. SOOON. And that depends alot on MYSELF too....efficient pls.

Ok, today I am feeling much better. Relationship with the team is better too.....

I wonder why I "sleep talked" yesterday night, and told you I am disappointed in you. I don't recall, and I don't mean it.

*I need to take a long break from work. It's stressful...and killing my brain cells* But, looking on the positive side of things, I am glad I work my brain alot these days, which I never did in the past. :)

Ok, no lesson on Sat. I shall devote my day to Fluffy...haven't brought him out for long. I promised my lil one yesterday night that I'll walk him to west coast park on Sat. *loves*

I'm glad I din go to sleep with a confused mind and a heavy heart.
I'm thankful I came online...
and saw my twin.

This is it:
Do the bare minimum for people who don't appreciate.
Spend more effort on people who do.
So..
Focus, work, and move on.
Target to complete what is given, and nth more.

Thanks twin.

If there is one thing I hope for now, I hope that I can fast forward to the end of this audit. I never felt so helpless, not only in terms of the deadline, but interpersonal issues, which is not obvious to others, and will never be. As if work itself is not tiring enough. :( Let me do this...tomorrow onwards, I shall ignore ALL comments from EVERYONE, and just focus on getting the work out. NO RUBBISH please. I shall keep my MOUTH SHUT. Wanting to be too responsible in everything is not working for this audit, cos it may not be viewed positively by others. SO BE IT.

Focusing on the "lows" isn't too motivating. And I am glad I have things which make me feel more "balanced".

jQ: Well, I am glad u forgave me. I am truely touched. *I enjoy playing princessssss btw...hehehe*
Fluffy: I guess, fluffy is really impt in my life...gg home and seeing him, I feel alive again.
Dance: After each practice, nothing seems to bother me too much anymore. I live to dance.

NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE.
I WILL GET THINGS DONE.

I had a bad day yesterday. Not only was I sick....I had to bash u up. :( I am deeply hurt by my own actions, and I know I have caused permanent damage to you too. I didn't mean to, but I have lost control of myself totally......and for a moment I thought I have lost my mind, and on several occasions, I thought...I really needed some help. I broke down more often than usual...it's a lot of stress, from everywhere, including myself.

I wonder if you really understand, but, if there is one thing you could do for me, is to be there for me.

I am sorry.

Nobody seems to understand my position except for that someone. Probably that is the reason why I am so upset to see her go, cos there won't be anyone who can really understand. The unnecessary attention is not doing me good, but making me very glum. I lost my usual cheery self, in exchange for a heavy heart. I don't want to be part of the "rubbish", and be manipulated by anyone...but I know it's gona be hard. I find myself losing control, and insecure. Sometimes, "butcher" and his "butcher frens" send a cold shudder down my spine. Can I just be true to myself??

Somehow, me and my twin are at our "lows". Both cried yesterday. I don't know how to comfort her...cos I am at a loss too. She seemed to be having this friendship problem with toxic friend...I think I understand. U bring someone in, and that someone make herself more popular than u. Girlish issues, but real tacky.

ok, I think I nid to clear my mind now. I shall NOT think abt office................................

What makes a good leader?

A good leader is one who provides directions, and gets the team to the destination, no matter what the process is. A good leader is one who allows the team to learn and grow, to be a more effective worker, no matter how it is done. A good leader is NOT one who makes everyone happy.

Maybe, one day I may experience the same things. Well, just be true to yourself.

If there is one good thing that happened to me over this 1 year, that is to get to know you and work for you. I never learnt so much since the day I started work... I've forgotten when I started to know you deeper, but I will never forget the day you shed your tears. You are someone I admire and will always be. Thanks for hearing me out on bad days and thanks for sorting out my thoughts for me at Starbucks. It is painful to know you are leaving, but I believe it is the best for you. I'm sure you have given it a thorough thought....

You don't know how much the team has benefited under your leadership. Things wouldn't have been the same without u.

I will miss you and all the best.

Back from lsn at Annie. Completed the Chacha finally, and start a little of Rhumba. Shall work hard on it...

Yesterday at Safra, I saw Sam/Mich and the students...I felt so awkward, but i knew I had to face this one day. Pretty much affected, but I dono why. It just felt intimidating and I couldn't dance properly. Well, it's ok. :)

Later is Ah Ling's bdae dinner at Yio Chu Kang. I've been so busy that meet-up with sisters are often bdae celebrations. *guilt* errrrrh. That's all for now, I am pretty exhausted.